A,
“Why are you so successful?” asked the programmer.
Kobe: “Do you know what it’s like in Los Angeles at four in the morning?”
Program ape: “know, usually at that time I still write code, why?”
Kobe Bryant: “Uh… .”
Second,
Goddess: If you can make this forum noisy, I’ll go with you tonight.
Programmer: PHP is the best language!
Forum fryer, all kinds of quarrel.
Goddess: Come on, let’s go. You can do whatever you want.
Not today. I have to convince them that PHP is the best language.
Three,
I am a bitter B programmer, tonight work overtime to fast all night, sleepy fast open eyes, female boss is very concerned about, ask me not to eat snack. I said angrily, snack calculate, can let me sleep on the line. The female boss blushed and said “hate”, and then sat beside me motionless, as if the distance was very close to me, made me very nervous, did she find my program out of the bug?
Four,
The husband must look for programmer ！！！！！！
Big money and little talk make a quick death
Five,
The wife makes a phone call to be a programmer’s husband: “come off work along the way to buy a catty steamed stuffed bun to bring back, if see sell watermelon, buy a.”
That night, programmer husband holding a steamed stuffed bun into the house…
Wife anger way: “how did you buy a steamed stuffed bun? !”
The husband answer: “because saw sell watermelon.”
Vi.
Seven,
Someone posted: “Guys JR, I want to make a programmer, what should I pay attention to…”
Some ape: “wait for me to go off work to tell you……”
Then… There is no next
Eight,
Programmer A: “I eat rice with fish fragrant pork slice. what do you eat?”
Programmer B: “Gong bao chicken cover rice.”
Programmer A writes in the menu:
Rice covered with shredded pork in fish flavor 1
Kung Pao chicken covered with rice 1
Programmer B: “I still want beef noodles!”
Programmer A more correct menu:
Rice covered with shredded pork in fish flavor 1
// Kung pao chicken covered with rice 1
Beef noodles, 1
Nine,
A programmer decided to practice calligraphy after retirement, so heavy money to buy the four treasures of the study. One day, after the meal suddenly unripe elegant xing, one time grind ink imitate paper, and dot go up good sandalwood. Calm down for a moment, splash ink, solemnly write a line of words: Hello world!
Ten,
A female classmate have a meal in the dining room, a program ape gather together to the side, “classmate, I can talk with you not, I have not talked with a girl for a month.
Eleven,
Programmer’s reading history: INTRODUCTION to X language — > application practice of X language — > advanced programming of X language — > science and art of X language — > beauty of programming — > The Way of programming — > Zen of programming — > Rehabilitation guide of cervical spondylosis.
Twelve,
Two programmers are chatting: “I met a hot girl yesterday. I brought her home and immediately started kissing her voraciously, and she sat on my keyboard and…” “You have a computer at home? What model is the CPU?”
