One, boss slang

  • You come to my office == I have another wonderful idea
  • Focus on the user experience == make the interface look good
  • Product temperament is not young == saturation is the highest
  • The product temperament is not mature == the interface is all made black
  • The product is not enough atmosphere == I don’t know which bad anyway is bad
  • To feel delicate == copy the apple
  • Take advantage of the user’s inherent habits
  • To pursue popular design trends == Copy wechat/Taobao/Didi…
  • What you said is another question == what I said is right
  • You mean the same as I do == WHAT I say is right
  • We’re talking about two things == I’m right
  • We have flexible hours = we don’t pay for overtime
  • We have a flat management == there are very few people in the company
  • We’ll give you a lot of options == not a lot of salary
  • We have fruit bowls every day! == may be the only perk of the company
  • The top priority is to seize the market == fast hair subsidies
  • Quickly build barriers to user groups == quickly pull them into the wechat group
  • To allow users to generate spontaneous transmission == quickly let them forward moments
  • In order to grow healthily, we need to launch the next round of financing
  • We fired some people who couldn’t keep up with the company. = The company has run out of money
  • A subsidy war is not really in line with our company’s philosophy == The company has no money
  • We’re looking for a partner = all we need is a programmer
  • We have a great idea = all we need is a programmer
  • Big data technology = log has not been emptied, are saved, what use I do not know
  • Adopt cloud technology = rent several servers in IDC

Two, product manager slang

  • Product design should be simple == complicated I don’t know
  • Users are supposed to run out of time. I don’t care if they come back
  • This is the usual typical practice == I copied wechat/Taobao/didi…
  • Need to capture the humanity == put more pictures of beautiful women
  • Consider the user’s usage scenario == add a night mode
  • Business models should be closed loop == put things online to sell
  • To build a perfect user operation system == do an integral mall
  • Have a social element that promotes activity == plug an IM
  • No users because not good operation == not my pot
  • Poor experience due to technical implementation issues == not my pot
  • The interface is ugly because the design is not good == it’s not my pan anyway
  • I’ll go back and check on that. == Stop. I didn’t think of that
  • In? == Need to change requirements
  • Brother is tired recently do you want to drink milk tea == need to change
  • The… A sentence… I don’t know… == Need to change requirements
  • I’m sure I won’t change it next time
  • Your suggestion is a good one. We’ve already thought of it
  • We’ll take your suggestion into consideration == It seems a bit silly
  • Your suggestion is very enlightening == hahaha what Jabal thing

Three, programmer slang

  • Your demand is not clear == I don’t want to do it
  • Current technology can’t do it == I don’t want to do it
  • Now the server performance can’t keep up == I don’t want to do it
  • Go to the boss/project manager and make an appointment == I don’t want to do it
  • Why do you keep changing your requirements? == X
  • How did you make it so complicated == X
  • Why did you give it such a short time
  • In? == There will be an extension
  • Do you want to drink milk tea
  • The… A sentence… I don’t know… == There will be an extension
  • We won’t postpone it next time == We’ll deal with it this time
  • Step back and talk. Don’t spit on my baby keyboard
  • Don’t press your boobs on the table == my baby keyboard won’t take it
  • You tell me what to type and I’ll do it myself. Don’t you touch my precious keyboard with your dirty hands
  • Why do you still use Word? Markdown is the best writing tool
  • Why are you still using a ThinkPad? The Mac is the best computer
  • Why are you still teaching yourself Java? PHP is the best language

Original: http://www.runoob.com/w3cnote/programmer-word-remember-boss-word.html