Original: Taste of Little Sister (wechat official ID: XjjDog), welcome to share, please reserve the source.
Fiction, coincidence.
It’s a fine day today with no haze. The setting sun such as blood residual red, according to the face burning. Very painful.
Looking around this crowded ten flat, the heart mixed emotions. On the table in the corner, piled with my books. Machine Learning, Tensorflow, Entanglement, The Road to Quantitative Trading… Dozens of brain-burning books instead of my companion, have accompanied me through the dark night. The lamp in one corner of the table was still on, as if competing with the setting sun. I just want to sit still until the night eats away at me.
I’m a programmer, female, Taurus. Unmarried. A little old. Very indoorsy, low consumption. Hard work and luck have made some money in the past decade or so. The income is not small, but there is no sense of security.
The IT girl is careful and so am I. So I do AI. (Ai, don’t get the wrong idea) This is my capital. Taurus is stingy with money and so am I. So I trade stocks. This is my nightmare.
The wind in autumn is cool. In the window, I shivered. Wealth on paper is nothing but a dream. The moon in the water, but the end of an illusion. I’m out of stock.
I leveraged it. From my inflated ego. From my confidence. When I think about it. I feel that life is boring. I’m not getting any younger, but I lost. It’s like being held against a wall by a bully, with no outlet for shame.
Women speculation, after all, is not ah. I lost everything, including my youth and love. Including my favorite wealth.
I can’t get any better at technology, so I can’t make any more money. I can’t turn my skills into cash.
I want to write some articles about artificial intelligence to share. Share how I learned from watermelon book and CS231n to grow into a professional AI tuner. However, when I really put pen to paper, I found that it was just another way of expression to repeat the knowledge of others. What others consider profound, I call shallow. What is the technical content? Everything is just a hand. Contradiction? So I didn’t write anything.
I know that chip technology entered the quantum world when it developed to 1nm, and now it is less than 5nm. I also understand that deep learning is still a competition for computing resources, not intelligence. It’s all just a puff! Cattle! To force! But why did I believe in the myth of artificial intelligence, and ultimately fell on the concept of artificial intelligence. I think it’s “just being in the mountains”.
Then I got into quantitative trading. My job is to do AI, so I have an advantage. The system I trained outperformed the best investment firms. If I’m so good, why not go big?
At this time, merchants gave me a phone call. You give me cash, but I have to pay you back monthly. Bully me don’t understand finance, this is not a loan is what. He told me it was a credit limit booster. I gave it a try, and it took me a few years to get up to a very high limit. It came in handy in ’16.
My money exploded in ’16. Yes, explosive. I carefully control my position and never fill it. I greedily expand funds, always full of financing.
But 17 years is my nightmare. There are many reasons, but I don’t want to summarize them. I only buy chips and A.I. I think I know a lot. I turned out to be wrong. What I know is wrong, so isn’t it a crime for me to analyze what I don’t know and share it with people who don’t know? I’m kind, aren’t I? I will quit forever. So what’s the point of summarizing?
Next I have to pay off a million-dollar loan. Return it empty-handed. Work hard and work for ai. Every minute of it stirred my pain.
And then what? I’m not getting any younger. Also can’t be like the star that sweeps the screen today, whole allow to marry rich person.
Maybe I’ll drift to a strange place and survive. Perhaps, I will find a look past the old man, muddle along. There was no chance of a counterattack. Lost the courage to struggle. Now I’m a zombie. Isn’t it just a common salted fish?
Can you give little sister a hand?
Xjjdog is a public account that doesn’t allow programmers to get sidetracked. Focus on infrastructure and Linux. Ten years architecture, ten billion daily flow, and you discuss the world of high concurrency, give you a different taste. My personal wechat xjjdog0, welcome to add friends, further communication.
