A second child
Said ten months: must be the daughter, finally fell off the strip
2020 really comfortable, for several years in a row to run, the heart has always wanted to rest. My job is stable and leisurely. My wife has also found a job. My work place is very close to me. Drive 40 minutes to work, write code in the morning, hang out in the neighborhood in the afternoon, and play a few dotas in the evening.
Life as it is, it is quite content.
However at the end of August, the wife sends me again two bar, I….. True belt bar youth also.
Wife company also have a little problem, then resigned, I think do planning also tired, and drag a big belly to work, not as good rest at home, learn front-end, later we write code together, is not happy.
If the second child hadn’t hit me in the head and boiled the frog, I’d be useless
Although now seems to be on the regular, every month to hand 13.6K, also can only maintain the basic life.
I’m just taking the burden off my mom’s sister’s wife
House loan 3000, car loan 2000, give wife 5000 every month, oneself 3600 life…… In fact, this salary is barely enough to live on
In these years, I owe my sister more than 30,000 yuan. If I pay back 1,000 yuan a month, I will pay back for three years.
Now two children, and 16 years to buy the house 18 years on the delivery of the house, really can not take money to decorate. It just stays there. Now 2 tire already board is nailed, decorate must carry on the agenda.
Just received two bars, my wife and I in the heart is not really want, pregnant eldest son to now, buy a house, get married, have a baby, work no prospect, rampage for 2 years, the day just passed a little bit, non-stop to have two children, really is a bit of breathing time do not give, the old debt has not finished, and add new demand.
Two families get the news, eat together, work for us, it’s a life after all. Say abort also just think, really want to put into action to go to the hospital, and a little loathe to give up, entangled in the best abortion time, calculate, come is fate, then, carry, bitter day always have boil head of a day.
Big head is to decorate, the wife hope I take out hundred thousand, hundred thousand affirmation is not enough also, I know her meaning, the rest of her to think of a way. The question now is, I also just make ends meet, pay to basic moonlight, no savings, still owe sister 30000, owes nearly three years, haven’t also a points, hollowed out to buy a house get married to parents in the home, still owe the others twenty thousand, relatives and friends has not developed in the Lord, every family has a book difficult to read, to borrow money is always the hardest, moreover is thousand.
Can not sleep, think of a night, or can only find sister to speak, four years of work as a teacher, frugal and simple, live in the school dining hall, usually not too much overhead. But I also know, one hundred thousand pair of him affirmation also is a ratio huge money, can squeeze her almost dry, and my reimbursement ability……. Not at all so far.
How to do, look around, are I owe people: although my parents have no ability, since childhood to me but also try to meet, married house has been all for me; My sister has been sensible and obedient since she was a child. After I went to Huannong University, she chose the free normal university student of Huannong Normal University with a high score of more than 630 points. After work, she had to keep lending money to her brother. My wife has an only daughter, who has not suffered much since she was a child. She hasn’t taken her anywhere to play with her friends or given her any presentable gifts for two years since she was married. My in-laws used to have an easy life, but now they have to help me take care of my children every day. They are very tired and have to endure the trifles of life.
I don’t know if all men, by this time, are this hard;
Sometimes I also think: why do I work hard, struggle more than, but still bad life?
Only hate consciousness too late, only sigh ability is insufficient;
We must pay double for the wasted hours of our youth.
Had to cheer up, lean on the bar dive, looking for the way to break the bureau
The struggle to the present
Get 13.6K, in Wuhan this place, in the front end of this field, is already very good, coupled with fewer things, relatively close to home, it is a dream job. I want to move up, like I did before, three or four thousand. Whether I can find such a job with my current technical ability or not, even if I do, the extra work and working pressure I need to bear are all costs that must be considered.
At the end of 19th, the company was in turmoil. Since the outbreak between China and the US in the past 20 years, the overseas study industry has been in a bleak situation. It is impossible to get promoted and pay rise based on their own duties.
Due to the cause of the outbreak in 2020, have been working from home, in order to revitalize the company business, with the outbreak of the campus network, I’m very busy, at the beginning of the company at the time is life and death, although it is the United States more than 20 years of mature enterprise, 19 years due to internal friction, company children AI programming into millions of dollars a boondoggle, and study in business because of the outbreak, The industry as a whole is devastated. The company’s two businesses are black swans, only cash flow to sustain.
Therefore, the whole company attached great importance to the campus epidemic network at that time. Under such pressure, I produced the wordpress version within three days, which enabled the Marketing Department to start operation. After that, I continued to reconstruct and iterate with VUE and finally reconstructed again with NuxT server rendering for SEO.
Busy to April, his wife was going to give birth, because the first child was born naturally, we thought it would be easier this time, but as a result, the amniotic fluid broke, the fetal heartbeat immediately decreased sharply, and his wife also had some fainting symptoms. The doctor immediately suggested a c-section, and at 20:20 on April 19, 2020, mother and child were finally in good health. The second son, Tian Tian, came into the world.
The child was born at that moment, I looked at his small face, small hands, in the heart of those doubts disappear, the familiar feeling of burning Bridges again, a malicious from the heart and born, the next day to his sister sent information, then borrow one hundred thousand. Since job-hopping goes impassable, short time wants to have growth, can only accept outsourcing.
- I took the computer to the hospital. When XiaoTian Tian and his wife were asleep, they browsed all kinds of posts about programmers taking private jobs. Finally, I registered a three-party platform such as programmer inn, code market and open source crowdsourcing.
- Send wechat to the teacher in charge of the enterprise, there is information needs can find me;
- At the same time, I chatted with a big V in the circle of friends. In 1997, I paid close attention to him when I was learning Java, and it has been more than 3 years since then. I watched him write articles and do we media little by little.
I take the initiative to contact the resources THAT I can try. I can’t manage so much. There’s nothing wrong with trying.
Small tian tian can’t sleep at night, the wife asleep after, small tian tian noisy I will embrace sleep, hug hug me once had on the camp bed asleep, wake up, I haven’t changed position actually, tian tian also sleep well, look at the time, after two hours, I’m a little scared, if I fell asleep openhanded, tian tian fell to the ground. I was afraid to sit with Tian Tian and forced myself to walk around the hospital. Feed your wife when she wakes up.
My sister did not long to call the money to me, as always, without much to say, MY heart also silently under a goal: rather than self-pity three years do not return the money, it is better to return a little every month, want to do, then every two months to return 5 thousand.
It’s a goal that has no reason at all, no consideration for the reality, and the reality is that I can’t afford more than $1,000 a month.
The rest must be done by other means.
The transformation of
As with career changes, make a list of everything you can try and attack it one by one
Light do not want to do, castles in the air, since hi just; Once you start acting, the ideas will flow, and then you can test them by acting, forming a closed loop and finding the right path.
I seem to go back to two years ago, every day from morning to night, evening to take care of the children
That’s how cheap you are. When I didn’t have my second child, all I wanted to do was play games
Now the birth of the second child, it is the moment of chicken flying dog jumping, but want to transition
I get up at six o ‘clock in the morning, run for half an hour, come back to write articles on the public account, go to work at half past nine and have a meeting, work until two o ‘clock, and then do private work, take the children out for a walk after dinner at seven o ‘clock, continue to check the missing work until 11 o ‘clock, and change diapers for the children at midnight
I didn’t think I’d be able to handle it, but it’s been three months
Under the great effort of the public number, in order to leave a message function, to buy other public number to do notarization; In order to have more video materials, buy and collect; Writing a lot of time every day;
The results were tepid, and the fan base grew very slowly
Make great efforts to contact enterprise teachers and students around the resources, and dinner is also close.
Results recommended a lot of lists, are not reliable, almost a week to achieve a wechat, the budget is only 10,000.
Finally, the platform with almost no hope received private work. After completing the preliminary data review, some orders came in one after another
But they are also some not very reliable lists, many requirements are not clear, after you do half, you have to change, but also said of course
The platform is also inclined to party A, party A must point acceptance, will make money, this is not overlord terms
A few months ago almost was persuaded to quit, thinking that anyway is a waste of time, so has been tepid to do some small projects
Wechat leaders there will also recommend some design from time to time, the function is not complex, but the time is tight, the money is not much, generally a week demand can earn a few hundred.
The cost performance is too low, five hours a day to finish the work, the private work is basically five to six hours, the hourly wage difference is five times
No way, since the goal is the sea of stars, then the process of small thorns must be endured
The turning point came in July, probably because I had done too many small projects. Suddenly, a big man asked me to build a React-Native app, which would cost 500 yuan a day and be settled on the same day. The construction period was three weeks
There’s pie in the sky. Suck it up
I looked at the demand, it is video is chat room is more TAB information flow, the app of the major half year of its own iteration is not so complex as he is, three weeks, but also android ios all online, I…….
It is of course full mouth promise ah, joke, that day settle accounts, send progress video to the person everyday and tomorrow arrangement went
Fortunately, the job was not too busy, and the public article also saved a lot of words, basic can all in
I discussed it with my wife and slept in the computer room at night
Open dry!
I don’t know how I lived for three weeks. I never left my study except to go to the bathroom, and MY mother brought me meals.
Fortunately, I have experienced from zero to the launch of my app before. Although the requirements have changed a lot, they remain the same. The architecture is ready-made, and the original requirements are third-party libraries.
After three weeks of hard work, one week was changed for more than 20 consecutive days, and more than 10,000 yuan was earned. Basic functions were completed. Later, they had react-Native engineers themselves, so they took over maintenance and iteration.
Looking at the number on the bank card, I felt so rich. The emancipated serf sang. Since graduation, my savings have never exceeded 10,000 yuan. After looking at it for a long time, I still didn’t buy it. I returned my sister 8K, gave Li 3K, and I streamed 2k activities, which was also quite good. After this, it seemed to open the situation
- For private projects, the front and back ends are found through the platform. The requirements are just a Word document, so it is better not to answer them. The requirements are not clear, and it is very troublesome to change them later. (Money multi-day or weekly settlement will be connected)
- Graduation project, it is best not to pick up, students have no money, although the demand is simple, but the price is very low, it is better to cultivate body and mind, waiting for a good opportunity
- Medium project, have their own product design back-end, design drawings and interface documents, requirements are more clear, then
- Large projects, have their own product design back-end, design drawings and interface documents, but do the nature of the platform, carefully connected
Anyway, the basic principle is: knot money fast, high hourly pay more consideration
Subsequently, ANOTHER VUE project, simple H5 and Web dual-end development, is based on project, and the money can only be received after clicking acceptance. I didn’t have a good project at that time, so I took my time. The requirements were changed in about a month. However, it took two months for the follow-up testing and bug solving, and countless new requirements and tests were not complete. Fortunately, I was not in a hurry at that time. I had already paid back my sister three months ‘money in advance, so MY mind was stable. Anyway, there was no good project for the time being. I’ll finish it in 1-2 hours. Take your time.
Then by the end of November, I had guaranteed the monthly payment of 2K-3K for my sister, which basically guaranteed the repayment speed of 5K for two months. Meanwhile, the VUE project was finally accepted. Although the time span was long, I had better get more than 10,000 yuan, and I had a loan repayment budget for several months. At the same time, the public account also restored the progress of a week, everything is steadily advancing.
At the beginning of December, the personnel of VUE project suddenly wanted to employ me for a long time. I would intern for 8K for three months and become a regular employee for 10K. My salary would be paid on 10th of every month.
Here comes the real turning point
Slowly I do not accept other private work, now the repayment is completely no problem, or want to do we media public number headlines nuggets zhihu, etc., to see if we can continue to break the game.
At the beginning of 21, I focused on my own job and full-time private work. After the initial stage of the project, everything was relatively stable. Basically, I worked for 5 hours in the morning and 4 hours in the afternoon for private work.
About front-end career change
First marry or settle
Man’s life, very simple, grasp two points, is basically positive. Difficulties are temporary, can be overcome, overcome. Partner, career. These two points go steady, the basic plate of life will not collapse, no matter how low your starting point, will only go more smoothly.
My wife is the object of my high school crush, graduated from university, special fate let us reunion. After talking with friends, you can talk about a lot of things, from high school stories to college stories. Home is also close, know the root, from the beginning there is a certain trust index. Our friends are also overlapping, classmates often come out to play together, sit under the wife’s home to play mahjong, kill all sides is not beautiful.
Also have a party, also make the divorce, after all these years, trivial a second child, buy a house decorate, turned from zero, are concentrated in together, really is the one breath pressure, we temper too big, I stubborn, she can go to now, rely on or trust and affection, emotion is a temporary, on second still can think of each other’s good.
If I had a wife, a big probability is nowhere, complete family, I have a home, I am willing to endure hardship, willing to start from scratch, willing to endure contempt and injustice, five years later, now, standing at the age of 30 nodes, forward, backward, the coordinates of life, the most appreciated this five years, to find the direction, establish occupation, Complete the primitive accumulation of turn a profession, the future is how, again have no confused do not know what to do feeling, basic dish already hit, what remain is perfect and accumulated.
I belong to the family before the career, which is nothing to be proud of. It just shows that before I was 25, I was mentally lazy. Because of laziness, the college entrance examination randomly selected major; Because of the fun, the university casually mix; Because of freedom, I just want to go to the fun city after graduation. Ideology, unable to keep up with age, is bound to be beaten by life. Two years of graduation, the name of selling fish, in fact, is unemployed, three years of graduation, but also in the community to take 2000 wages, the key is a bit of the desire to forge ahead are not.
Some people have seen the market since childhood, know the market, in the career choice of nodes, such as the timing of job-hopping, the choice of the first job, after the college entrance examination, the choice of majors, arts and science classes, can make their own choices, so step by step living flowers, more smoothly, after starting a career and then married.
But most people are like me, at the beginning did not have any consciousness, in the life of the beating, slowly realize the importance of career, career, choice. Catch up and write a story of fighting back. People are growing. It’s never too late to start.
“If you start now, you’ll be late at worst.”
A bit of self-learning about career change
01 — State of mind to be stable, choose a career, is to choose life
Age doesn’t matter when it comes to career change. Mentality is very important, want to make a lot of money, figure comfort, that career change is often not achieved;
Don’t go for short-term gains and losses, but for a five-year, ten-year plan.
When chairman MAO fought a war, he first had to unify his thinking. Career change is also, ideological awareness is the first step.
Choose an industry, often choose a kind of life. The criteria to judge whether you like it or not should be more diversified: remuneration, development, working style, interpersonal relationship, personal strengths, character…… To consider, weighing the pros and cons, two evils lighter.
I have been a veterinarian for five years, and the prospect is good for many people. However, when I think of dealing with pigs, horses, cows and sheep pets for the rest of my life, I feel so desperate.
When my sister became a teacher, she got a stable job and a sense of achievement in teaching, but she was often humbled by the fact that there was no channel for advancement, and felt sorry for having no like-minded comrades around.
Students do engineering, get money at the same time, there are entertainment every day, the site tired into the dog’s distress
Street civil servant selection and adjustment students enjoy stable, fame and fortune while, but also bear more trivial, not real trouble.
Big boss selling fish, make enough money, always say regret their life, will only sell fish, dirty and bad environment to accompany life.
There is no such thing as a good job, just a good job for you, while you are still young, experience more, ready for possible development, to the impossible career dabble, ask yourself, what do you want.
02 — Trial and error is essential, experience is the voice
People always only see a line of bright, there will be gains and losses; Good jobs are all the same, bad jobs are all different; At the beginning of your choice, you should pay more attention to the pain of the industry, whether you can bear it or not. Because it’s always these bad places that make you fall by the wayside.
How do you find out what your boundaries are? How do you really know yourself? You can’t just think about it. The first thing about career change is trial and error.
When I graduated, I thought I was extroverted and optimistic, and was good at sales, but I found I could not bear so much pressure. Want to pick up the professional, found that do not like animals endure every day; Want to do business to sell fish, found that the income depends on nature; Want to mix in the community of civil servants, found things miscellaneous affairs virtual do not like officialdom interpersonal;
To separate the wheat from the chaff, I’m looking for an industry that doesn’t need to be judgmental, with development and technology. Choose computers and Traditional Chinese medicine.
Try a lot in a short period of time, from the work treatment, working hours, working mode, promotion channels, interpersonal relationship and other multidimensional considerations, find the priority that they can not bear, choose a life.
Don’t care too much about the difficulty of changing careers, it takes time, once you find it in your heart, the most difficult step of changing careers has been crossed.
After deciding to change career goals, do not make grand plans, it will only increase impetuous; No matter when you start making a career change, believe that you have a long life ahead of you, long enough to know everything you need to know to make the change. More to feel the change of career learning itself brings fun, less to care about temporary gains and losses; To taste the progress process from not knowing, from not being able to be able, to enhance self-confidence; Wait for you from small white to entry, again to expert, external conditions naturally will slowly become better.
Be in boundless hell, family member does not understand, the body is tired, pay does not keep alive even oneself…… In the early stage of career change, it is likely to experience these. Spare some time to run, sweat, and express the accumulated emotions. Do not make decisions because of emotions, but make plans when the will is clear.
Here I would like to emphasize the importance of running. I do not have a strong tolerance. In fact, I am emotional and stubborn. The only thing is that I formed the habit of running in the morning in Jiangshan of Quzhou, only half an hour every day. Sometimes I am tired, so I can walk without running. When the body running up, troubles and stasis to express out, it is easier to make the right decision, our lifelong enemy, is their own emotions, now I have not lost my temper for a long time, and then unbearable things, endure a day, the next day when running, naturally dissipated.
Changing career inevitably means a lot of learning. According to my front-end knowledge, FROM the very beginning of HTML, CSS, JS, jquery, Vue, vuex, React, React-native, Node, browser, network, security……
If I had known at the beginning that I had to learn so many things, I might have given up. I watched Java for more than half a year and wrote some small projects, just to cultivate the learning habit. Later, due to the failure of life, I thought to try my best to find an IT job. At the beginning, I just want to use HTML + CSS to write a web version of the resume. Different companies have different technology stacks, so I went through the above knowledge points step by step.
Life is pushing, where there is no plan, the direction is determined, just keep moving forward.
03 — Develop an interest and think more from a lifetime perspective
Small white study, maintain interest is the first priority, and heavy task, will kill interest; Steps can be small, as long as you don’t give up.
If you don’t understand the concept, put it on hold. You can’t do the project. Stop for a while and give yourself more time to find your interest. I was curious about the effect of the code and how I could write it this way and see it in the browser. So I started out with a bunch of simple front-end projects, copying code like crazy, yeah, just copying a little bit of code, and looking at it in the browser; Later is to the video copy, copy to really do not understand the place, will look at the document. I am stubborn, do not understand the place, I do not sleep also have to knock. After copying this for half a year, I almost copied the front-end vue, React, Node, small program projects all over again, it seems to get through the two channels, some knowledge points naturally understand, one is to know the effect, the other is to know how to write, then look at the document, a lot of knowledge points are clarified, and then all kinds of knowledge points are connected into the surface. I was also able to choose a technology stack for architecture based on project requirements.
In this process, I did not strive for a quick promotion and salary increase, but simply like copying, at the beginning of the small goal is to copy 10 minutes of code every day, slowly half an hour, an hour, then do not set the time, almost have time to copy, really feel pleasure from copying code to see the effect.
Therefore, IN fact, I did not feel too much pain in the process of career change. Those who are familiar with me all know that I am used to giving up, impulsive and sensitive, and work is not good, SO I may just leave. With codes to copy and a paycheck to get every month, there’s a greater tolerance for life’s bumps and bruises.
As for the 35-year-old cut-off that has been touted in the IT industry, I’m not afraid of IT at all. One is that I am also continuing to learn, and I am not complacent because my job is stable. Second, I am optimistic about the development of IT in the future, and will surely walk into every aspect of life with the development of science and technology. Third, I actually do not have too big pursuit, to maintain food and clothing, small wealth at peace, these years should be the most money shortage of life, to 35 years old, unless there is a black swan event, a month can ten thousand dollars is not very moist.
Career change front, is one of the most successful things in my life, worth blowing a lifetime.
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